Wednesday, June 12, 2002


Oh, sorry, did I disappoint you? Did you just put a search into Google that said BOOBS TITS HOOTERS or something equally prosaic? How about SEX HOT DIRTY SEX WITH MINORS? Well, you've found none of the above. Nyeah.

Anyway, I'm having one of my GIGANTIC TITS cut open tomorrow. Blah blah blah lump blah blah blah biopsy, blah blah blah. I've had a fibrous cyst in my other TITTY so I'm not overly concerned. Mostly, I would like for it to be over. They told me there are "suspicious calcifications" that will also need to be removed. I have assured them that nothing that lives in my VOLUPTUOUS BREAST is planning to take over the government, but they insist on taking out the calcifications anyway. Go figure. I will need to have a word with my body parts to stop acting suspicious, because I would like to retain most of my anatomy, if possible.

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