Revisions to the Military Alphabet

We work with someone who just got called up to active duty and will be shipped off somewhere, he can't say. Somewhere with turbans, we suspect. At any rate, he called the other day and repeated a number using "niner niner" at the end (military speak for 99). That made us wonder if he was going to start using the military alphabet to spell things, too. Just in case, we looked up what they would be. (A is Alpha, B is Bravo...) All told, there are two dances (Foxtrot and Tango), two literary characters (Romeo and Juliet), but only two that we really think exemplify the "typical" GI's world - Whisky and Kilo. Therefore, we believe that a new system should be instituted:(invaluable assistance by KelRocks...)

A = Alcohol

B = Beer

C = Condom

D = Drugs

E = Ecstacy

F = .... FOOZEBALL!

G = Grenade

H = Hazing

I = Indecency

J = Jarhead

K = Kilo (we'll leave that one)

L = Lap dance

M = Minors

N = Naked

O = Opium

P = Pawn shop

Q = Quarantine

R = Roofies

S = Sex

T = Tattoo

U = Underage

V = Veneral disease

W = Whiskey

X = X-rated

Y = Yo

Z = ZZZZZZ.... (what the hell starts with Z???)